This post is going to be SO GREAT. I’m going to teach you, from my many years of experience, how to work full-time, have kids, and have a PERFECT Christmas. Just kidding.
For almost 2 decades, I’ve managed 3 kids and a full time job. My husband helps but as a pilot, he’s gone 60% of the time, which means most days I am on my own.
So far, the kids are all somewhat functioning, 2 in high school one in college. But many of my days are stressful and I frequently have that headache – you know the one? The one where you feel this pressure right behind your eyeballs and fear your head will explode? If you don’t know that headache don’t worry about it. But good for you! You’re living right! (and we can’t be friends)
But during the holidays, the whole thing changes. The already precarious stability that we occasionally enjoy is seriously threatened.
Because there is SO. MUCH. PRESSURE. Let’s consider this lovely quote from Caroline Kennedy:
“It’s true; Christmas can feel like a lot of work, particularly for mothers. But when you look back on all the Christmases in your life, you’ll find you’ve created family traditions and lasting memories. Those memories, good and bad, are really what help to keep a family together over the long haul.” – Caroline Kennedy
Yes, that’s right. The overall feeling here is that if you do it wrong your family will not be kept together over the long haul. And probably nuclear war.
How you do Christmas determines the very quality of your family’s future.
Um . . .or not.
I remember clearly being in Target one lunch hour in the middle of December some year. It happened every year so it doesn’t really matter which one.
We were all there – the working moms- exhausted, sleep deprived, crazed. But there are some things you can’t buy on Amazon Prime and since you can’t be late to pick the kids up and you can’t miss work, Target at lunch is THE place to be.
I did my shopping and then got in the very long line at the drive through so I could eat, or rather inhale, my lunch and somehow make it back for a long afternoon of working. I did this day after day after day. For a month. It was bad. Really bad. I did it wrong.
And I want you to know right now, Wonderful Moms – you don’t have to be me. Christmas and it’s ridiculous lean towards the Patriarchy is set up for you to fail. I mean seriously, Santa might be a man but I know no one who’s husband really chips in this time of year like he could. It’s just not important to most men.
SO, here’s what you do:
- Pick the 2 or 3 things that you ENJOY doing during the holidays and ditch the rest. The party you get invited to that’s on a weeknight and you just can’t handle because you’ll have to get a sitter and be away from the kids that you didn’t see all day? DITCH IT. Buy the cookies. Half-ass the decorating (or choose just one thing – the tree, the yard, whatevs) and do it great.
- Don’t skip your lunch hour to do Christmas errands. This is stupid and leads to crankiness that you’ll stuff and then you’ll either over-eat or over-drink your feelings. THIS IS BAD.
- If your kids are old enough GIVE THEM CASH. You know there will be a point when you just can’t shop anymore. So buy what you can and then give them money. KIDS LOVE MONEY. (you think I’m joking. I’m serious as an egg nog induced heart attack).
- Do the things YOU love. What is it for you? Christmas movies? Going to the Nutcracker? Starbucks with your bestie? Yoga (which I don’t get but I’m trying)? Make time for the things you love.
Bottom line your family won’t notice what you’ve skipped. I swear they won’t. But they’ll notice if you’re a neurotic sleep deprived lunch skipping mess.
I know because I have some friends that did that. Bless their hearts.